Fireside Chat Transcript 10 Oct 2k21
From Goon Wiki
Alrighty boys and girls, we're gonna get started here in a couple minutes when the numbers stabilize. It is a no bones day here in Madison, Wisconsin. There is a storm that just blew in, but not an exciting storm, one of those dreary storms. So instead of giving a dreary storm a sodden fireside, I'm gonna make sure that I'm high enough on various substances to attempt to be as entertaining as possible for you today. We have a couple of interesting policy changes to go over. That's gonna involve a lot of, hopefully, more focused death. And I'm gonna sit on my hands and not talk about it right now, because I just said I was gonna be able to get here. But yeah, as you can see, I'm a little psyched. Substances, that's nothing new, I just managed to smoke a bowl just before I came out here today. [inaudible] I apparently roboted in the last link, so let's see if this thing's still on. There we go. Alright, well let me know if I start roboting again randomly, guys. That'll at least give me an idea that that's coming. It's kind of strange, as you guys know from the words, it's pretty rare for me to lose a link. But I also don't start doing a fireside the start of a thunderstorm, typically. So there you go. That's a useful segue there, BP is pointing out that I'm just as bad as the server performance in BKR. And one of the things I wanted to start off with today is a bit that is a recurring theme on firesides, because it is unfortunately a recurring theme in the wider galaxy. And I have a plan that will hopefully mess with this. Now maybe it won't mess with this, I don't know, but we're going to try some stuff and see if we can result in more puppy blood, death, and anger. I want them fighting. We are about to make reference, of course, to Pappy is still Pappy. Now, us swapping a fleet randomly is not a big deal. Like, whatever, serve fleets get lost randomly. What's relevant about that BR5 fight there, and if somebody can link it in Elysium, you guys know the one I'm talking about because it's the one from just the other day where, who is there, horde, test, severance, all of our dear favorite Pappies flying together in exactly the same way that you would expect. It's as if the war did not stop because, boy howdy, as far as the Imperium is concerned, the war has not stopped. As far as the rest of the game is concerned, they're starting to fight amongst each other, starting to do whatever, but when it comes to us, Pappy is still Pappy. And we can never forget that, and don't worry, I'm not going to let anybody forget it, because as soon as these fuckers do this shit, I'm going to be screaming about it from the rooftops and waving a bloody fucking shirt. But I don't think a bloody shirt is enough. When we ended the Delve phase of the war, when we healed Mother Delve, I said that we had three primary strategic threats in the post-war environment. The biggest war criminals, as far as I was concerned, from the Vietnam War, were three alliances that had the most responsibility in terms of man-hours dedicated to our ruin. They sucked at it, and they lost, but still, you know, that passed, those debts have to be paid. And that, of course, is Horde, Test, and Brave. Horde, Test, and Brave. Give everybody a little status update on where our enemies are and how I feel about how we're doing before I shift into what we're going to do next. So, Brave. I've been asked a lot of questions about Brave, because they are up in the galactic northwest, and they are a continual source of drama and amusement as they sort of gradually fall down a mountain into whatever the hell. I hope for Dunk's sake that he goes full autocrat, purges the council, establishes leadership, and then, like, you know, maybe he turns it into a thing. Because if that's the case, then it's an entity that is not really the same as the entity that shorted armor, or I guess I should say, Pavik Snowden, led all those fleets against us during the war. But Brave hasn't really put down enough for us to go purge. Right? Like, they simply did not put down enough assets in Geminate. Their situation is such that I believe that it is currently kind of a waste of our time to, right now, go after Brave and mess with them, because there's just nothing there for us to destroy in the form of a fucking deployment, right? We generally speaking, and I want you guys to understand this, because the rest of the game might be like, "There's no war, but I am making plans and plays six months a year ahead for the next ones, and we have a certain amount of outgoing negative expected value that we can dump on these fucking nerds." Right? Like, there's a certain amount of time, and I want to make sure that that havoc is deployed specifically against the people that we really want to fuck over. So, Brave is kind of irrelevant. Like, they're off up there doing whatever, they're not really worth it right now. But, you know, I hate peace. I want blood on my hands of some kind, right? Like, we went out on a little roam last night, and I got to scratch my anti-support itch, and, you know, I just love smacking frigates down with anti-support ships, because I'm that guy. But, anyway, whatever. Before I get distracted and start telling stories about that, instead I would rather talk about the next on our Vietnam war criminals list, which is, of course, TEST. Now, as I got to experience myself last night, it is super fucking easy to get out to Outer Passage and mess around with these bitches. It is very simple. And many of you have been out there doing that, and I want to encourage that. One of the things that I would like to point out here is, in these ops where you're going on like a filament fleet, or you're getting in a fucking wormhole, like a Kiki op, and you're getting out there and you're fucking people up, those are a great opportunity for you guys to work on your F2s. You might not have heard me talk about F2s in a bit, because that was a whole war-related thing, but that's not a war-related thing. That is a core operating system change to Gunstorm Federation. It is, work on your fucking F2s. Now that we are at peace, there are more than ever opportunities to do this, particularly on some of these tactical harassment levels. These are skills that a lot of goons have not necessarily developed. A lot of you developed them during the war, but there has never been a better time to reach out across the galaxy and stab some of these bitches while learning interesting upgrades to your skill set. If you don't know what I'm talking about when I'm saying developing your F2, that means that you are welcome aboard. I'm guessing that means that you're relatively new here. Check that thread out at the, I think it's still stickied in the War Room, of the Cultural Revolution, is it is no longer enough for us to just do F1. We must learn interesting and special skills that will help the greater good. And those skills that I'm particularly interested in us develop involve lots of dead enemy hardware, specifically in the form of Rorqual's capital ships and anything that is hard to replace in the year of our Lord 2021. So TEST. TEST doesn't have that much in terms of heavy infrastructure down, but they do actually have a lot of heavier things in space. So if I was able to point us towards harassment, there's not much to it. There's not too much out there in terms of like brave Rorquals for us to go up there. So I think that the Galactic Northwest is sort of a waste of our time at the moment. I'm not going to say don't go roam there. I'm not going to say don't go on your own free time and shoot them if you feel like it. But I'm saying in terms of operational value, I think that the Galactic Northeast is where the jagged knives should be stabbing. Great. What else do they have? Well, Horde is still active. Horde still hates our fucking gun. And Horde is still turning up in places like BR5. So Elfboy is very valuable for TEST. They are also in a position where we cannot necessarily do more to them besides ganking their Rorquals and their heavy assets, but there's a lot of value on NETX. There is potentially a whole bunch of stupid bullshit between the puppies, between the pappies, that is about to break out in EVE Online. Now, I don't know exactly what form that's going to take. There is the FRT versus AOM thing. There is the fire versus Wrecking Crew, Red Alliance. There's all sorts of shit that is beginning to pile up all around us. And that's great. There's a lot of potential here. But there's also a potential to waste the opportunity. I'm not going to say that there's a potential for a danger here. I'm not going to say we beat the entire galaxy in the last year and a half. And if we fuck this up, we're in deep shit. But there is an opportunity that I believe that we have here. And I don't want to fuck it up and whiff the opportunity to get all these motherfuckers killing each other again. That's what I want. I want the puppies at each other's throats. So I'm going to take a reference from Battletech here and try to apply it to EVE Online. Basically, what I want us to do for the next little while here, and you'll see once these policy changes, but as these potential wars between the pappies are beginning to heat up, I want us to do a kill the meat, spare the metal policy. Which means I don't want people shooting random puppy citadels unless it's been authorized by the fucking military. Unless the Adj is saying this is a citadel we want to shoot, I want you to focus on murdering the puppy capitals. You should focus on developing your skills to better harass the puppies. I'm going to take a Battletech reference, and I'm going to take a fucking 40k reference that's completely at odds with the Imperium meme. And we're just going to jam them together here. Essentially, we're kind of doing a lot of Dark Eldar Raider shit. Like we're popping out of the fucking webway, we are harvesting souls, and we are scampering back to Komorah using filaments and God only knows what else. We're not going to talk about the sources and methods on the fire side, but you guys know what's up to be this way. First of all, citadels have been recently falling into our hands in a way that I'm not going to discuss in further terms, but I think that there is a value chain that goes from citadels that are under our tantrum radius to potentially those citadels becoming ours. And we need citadels. Everybody needs citadels, to one way or another, but in the case of our enemies, they haven't put barely enough down. Anyway, the point is this. I don't want you guys shooting random citadels unless it's been signed off by the military, because I want the puppies to shoot each other's citadels such that these things can turn into a hot war. What we have unfortunately seen in this last week, and it's going to be consistent, because again, Pappy is still Pappy. Pappy is still Pappy. That means that when we randomly shoot a fucking citadel instead of blowing up a Roarqual or a Capship, then potentially we're getting drawn into this war that I want these guys to start first. I want the puppies to get a whole bunch of blood on each other's hands, and then I want us to slit some throats. But not before, because if we just allow citadel creep in an uncontrolled way, if we're just shooting random citadels in these hot zones, they're going to do what they did earlier in the week, which is immediately ally up, Pappy up, and they're going to stop killing each other. I want us focused on doing as much damage as possible to the individual pilots of our enemies, and that is why I want you to develop your F2s in terms of, like, look, if I can figure out PI, if I, with my simple little bitten brain, can figure out planetary interaction - still need water and broadcast nodes, by the way - if I can figure that out, and I can figure out as an F2 to both lead an alliance and also maybe be okay at an anti-support role in a fleet, do it. You can do it. You can do it. There's a great opportunity to reach out and fuck these guys. So what we're going to be doing here particularly is if we can - we have to have them actually put the assets on the field, but right now CCB has made it such that we can't easily replace capital ships, so instead of wasting our time and our effort on having random people that are not authorized by, like, the chain of command to randomly siege hostile structures and thus give an excuse for the Pappys to get together and whatever, I really want us focused on learning how to hunt down and blow up their capital ships and really just do that. Because at a line - remember, these guys have shitty SRP and their economies are in the gutter, so the more individual pilot-level assets that we can extinguish, the better. So this is where we're getting to kill the meat and spare the metal. Ignore the structures, annihilate the spaceships. However you want to do it. Alright, let me take some questions here, because I want people to understand the policy here. It's not just like I'm saying don't shoot their fucking Citadels. I'm saying don't shoot their fucking Citadels because I want them to shoot each other's Citadels to set up fights, and I want us focusing on destroying their capital ships. This is the nearer thing I'll answer that question separately. That's more of a different thing. I particularly don't want things in our near borders, because I want this map of whatever it's gonna be. I'm not sure whether it's gonna be AOM versus FRT, I don't know if it's gonna be Fire versus Wrecking Crew and PIVC. It's that you can see the storm clouds are forming, and what I'm also seeing is that every time that we hit a timer aggressively ourselves, in an unplanned way, like some squad or SIG goes out there and decides that they're gonna shoot a Citadel, then this gives them an excuse to stop killing each other, and they all blob up and they go "Let's fight the goon!" And I want them killing each other. Once they get started killing each other, we will probably change this policy. I don't expect this to be a permanent thing, but right now, I want these motherfuckers fighting, and that means I don't want us randomly shooting Citadels unless there's a fucking sign-off from the military, and I want you guys to be working on doing a better job of acting like a fucking Dark Eldar radar, and getting out there and ganging their shit. Alright, let me take some questions here. Yeah, the PIVC versus Fire thing is really heating up. And I think that is the most likely scenario for the next conflict, and I want that to develop naturally without our fingerprints all over it, until it's time for us to put our fingerprints all over it. If we so choose. I don't know whether we will, but you guys know me. After all of this war stuff, as a strategic, like, from the "strategery zone," I always like to play my cards last. Like, if I can hold our cards and see what everybody else has put their cards down first, then I like to make our moves. Everybody else has committed to various courses of action, and I want these fucks to commit to killing each other. And to our advantage, we can do skill training, and in the meantime, work on unfucking and rebuilding our economy while those battle lines get drawn. So I want people to understand why we're doing this, because it's something we've never done before. I have never come before to answer them and said, "Please do not shoot random Citadels. Do not do this unless it's signed off by the military." So this is like a first-of-its-kind policy. So I want you guys to know why it matters, and what I want you doing instead. Because a Citadel doesn't scream. A dude in a RoarQual who's not going to get reimbursed, who's going to get made fun of by his friends, which, because they're not actually friends, because they're fucking pappies. You know, these people turn on each other when bad things happen, and we can deliver the bad things. And so I want to redirect where we're stabbing. That's why. Now there's going to be certain exceptions to this, right? Like I'm going to have a conversation with the Adj after the fireside as it relates to Outer Passage. There are certain regions where we're going to have--this is an example of military approval, where the military is going to say, "In this zone, go nuts." Right? But in other zones, we're going to have, "Don't shoot the Citadels here, because we want the puppies to shoot the Citadels," or we're trying to secretly buy the Citadels when nobody's noticing. "Does acting like Dark Elder mean we have to be super hedonistic and risk bringing Slash into Eve? The dream." As the Adj is saying, "Go shoot fire stuff, go shoot horde stuff, and go shoot test stuff." All of that is useful. So fire, horde, and test, always on the menu, boys and girls. Getting some questions about Burnjita. Unfortunately, I haven't really thought about Burnjita. I'd have to talk to Joe Painter about that. That is now on the radar. Thank you for bringing it up. I'm mainly focused on war and murder, because I want the puppies to have a war, and I want to harvest all sides, because they're all our enemies, and I just want to-- I want to be the worst possible honorable third party, and just get them all fighting, and then just run a lawnmower over the entire thing when they least expect it. That's kind of where I'm going. "Is Insurgent Squad still active?" Why, yes. I'm not sure whether recruitment for Insurgent Squad is open, but the Black Hand fucking owns. Speaking of developing your F2s, this is a wonderful opportunity for you guys to do that. Again, Brave is pretty fucking degraded. Test, I think we have-- I don't want to say that we've got them in a good place, but I do want us to keep hazing their Roarquals and getting better at that. I want you guys to develop your F2s. Get a fill 'em, and learn how to use a probing Hecate, and just bounce out there and fuck some dudes up, and just die until you learn. If I can do it, you can do it. "Did I know that EVE Vegas starts in 11 days?" Holy shit, boys and girls, Vegas in 11 days. I'm looking forward to seeing some of you. And those of you that can't come because of travel restrictions, you will be missed. I can't wait until we can get the gang back together and run around like a bunch of fucking drunkenized space nerds. Soon, my friends. Soon. There's also the DCEVE meetup. That is something that Merkleton, Brisk, and crew came up with, and I will be there. I'm looking forward to that. That is also in January. There is a post-- I think all the rooms might have already-- you're gonna want to book a room with the amazing rate that Mrs. Brisk found for the DCEVE meet if you're gonna do that, and do that soon, because, kind of like with all these other cool discounts that we get, they tend to go very quickly. GB has a general reminder, which is very long, but it is a PVE thing, and so I'm gonna read it. This is gonna be an official warning, I guess, and if you don't listen to it and you die, we'll point a laugh at you, because that's the people being idiots and joining the wrong fleet, or getting invite spammed and dying hilariously, is that they're sort of an object lesson or whatnot to do for everybody else, and if they learn their painful lesson and change their behavior after getting smacked, great, and if not, they'll die until they do. But here we go. A general reminder-- I'm gonna try to do this in some sort of I'm-on-weed voice. General reminder, 1DQ was not safe. There are drag bubbles and cloak dictors and assholes sending random fleet invites. Good, this makes me happy. I'm glad there's something-- The last thing that we want is for true peace, and peace is awful. Peace is weakness, right? Like, if people are not constantly trying to murder you when you're out in Delve, that means you're gonna think that you're safe, and you're gonna end up like these fucking people that we're harvesting out in Outer Passage. Don't be like that. Be in a fleet before undocking to prevent spam invites, even if it's only your one-man fleet. Get caught in stop or drag bubbles by scouting your way and using multiple bookmarks off the Citadel to reduce the chance of drag. I use an overview called Freighter Glance Overview that has everything that can bubble on it, friendly or hostile, as well as bubbles themselves. That's actually a bunch of really useful advice. Thank you, Gibby. I learned a thing or two. A question-- are we gonna go back to Fortizar and pretty much every system in Delve? Well, as soon as we can manage it, yes. That's a very good question. I want to talk about the Delve rebuild. So we are in the black, which is a huge achievement, considering the fact that we fought the entire galaxy with essentially no centralized economy available for a year and a half. So go Finance and go GESOL. I have nothing but fantastic things to say about the work that both Finance and GESOL have put into the rebuild. We are a long way to go yet, because across the entire game, it's hard to build stuff, right? And having 400 Fortizars appear out of the ether is not something that currently the EVE economy can sustain. We are attempting to get as many as we can as fast as we can, and that's going to be a process. It is an interesting situation, because right now, somebody was asking for a World War II analogy earlier in Elysium, because they wanted-- instead of a Battletech or Dark Elder reference, they wanted to have a boat analogy to be able to get us where we're going. The galaxy right now looks a lot like the economic situation globally in the immediate aftermath of World War II. Like, basically, huge chunks of the galaxy have been bombed back to the Stone Age. The places that have not been bombed back to the Stone Age are managed by people that don't actually understand how to optimize their economies, and we have a window of opportunity here. That doesn't mean that that window of opportunity is a guaranteed success. One of the reasons why I'm introducing this "the military must sign off on Citadel hits in regions and on targets" policy is precisely because I want us to take advantage of this post-war situation where our enemies are struggling, and I want to make sure that they are struggling more. I want an entire generation of goons to learn how to strangle these people in the fucking crib. I don't want TEST to have an opportunity to get their economy back. I'm delighted to see Brave being too poor to put any fucking Citadels down. I want us to learn how to reach across the galaxy and stab these people, because they will come back for us. Look earlier in the week. Pappy is still Pappy. They are all still our enemies, and we are under no obligation to play fair with them. So, I don't want you killing their Citadels, or trying to do that, unless the Adj and the military have told you to, but I want as much individual hellfire and damnation to rain down upon our foes, such that we can use this opportunity. If we bond them back to the Stone Age, for the ones that are actual threats, or could be potential threats, or we just want to fuck with them because TEST is next, fuck TEST forever, we want to make sure that those guys remain oppressed as we do our big economic rebuild. There is essentially, as the Adj just pointed out, we've dropped something like 2 trillion-esque worth of Citadels in the past 60 days. GSOL has been working overtime, and finance has also been working overtime, finding ways that we can make money better and own. Essentially, as soon as CCP unfucks the economy to a point that we can build Dreads or whatever, guys know me, peace is not my element. It's just not. As soon as we can get the ability to shit out Dreadnaughts again, I can't wait. I have so many things to show the galaxy. Hopefully they'll work. Not a good post, I'm a shitty poster. Don't get your hopes up for that. Alright, I'll take another couple questions. "Will this impact tower bashes or can we still..." Oh, that's a good question. So, will this impact tower bashes or can we still bash towers all we want? If it is authorized by the military, you can shoot at structure. That structure could be a Citadel or a POS. If it's not authorized by the military, don't shoot the fucking thing. If you were going out into an area where we want a PIBC and fire conflict to develop, and you are shooting PIBC stuff, we don't have a nip with them. I just want them all to kill each other. I don't want to say don't kill their shit, kill all the things. Just don't shoot the fucking structures unless it's been authorized. If you have a bug up your ass and you want to shoot structures, the military will provide you a list of authorized things to go shoot. There's going to be stuff to shoot, it's just we want to cut down on this bullshit. Where if I have a fire versus PIBC with FRT getting involved, if I want all of the papi to start killing each other, I don't want them to get distracted by "Well, we could fight or we could all blob up together and try to defend some random master who's somewhere because goons." Because that's exactly what they'll do. And that's exactly what they have been doing. This is a response to the actual fucking chessboard changing because these little dick bitches won't start real ass wars because "Boo, scary boo, goons, ref something." And then you see like you saw earlier in this week, "Oh, hey, here's Horde and Test and Severance and the whole dog and pony show." Somebody even found Razor to get on that DR. Is it allowed to shoot structures to provoke a response? I want to have you ask that question to yourself again. Here I just got done telling you that you're not allowed to shoot a fucking structure unless the military has said you're allowed to fucking do it. And you asked me if it's allowed to do it to provoke a response. I'm trying to be nice about this. I want the fucking puppies to fight. Don't fight me on getting the fucking puppies to fight, boys and girls. We want this war amongst the puppies. We want to run. Imagine getting them all to fight and lawnmowing the whole thing once they're committed. They're not going to commit to killing each other if you keep reffing their structures in an unplanned way. Follow the chain of command when it comes to shooting hostile structures. We will provide you ample targets. I want everybody to kill the bad guys. I don't want to be mad about this, but I want the right bad guy stuff dying. I want the ruckwalls. I want the capital ships. I want the screams of the individual pilots who are not getting reimbursed. And I want, in the meantime, I want the puppies to fight each other and reff each other's structures. I think I'm being very clear about this. I want this upcoming war. I want the puppies to go to a real war, and I want to fuck it over. But we can't do that until the puppies fight. So, sharpen your skills on hunting the individual puppy things. We want to kill the ruckwalls. We want to kill the carriers. There's never been a better time to learn how to reach out and stab these guys. We will have structures for you to shoot. They're just going to have a seal of approval from the adj in the military on them, and that's going to be that. Alrighty. Okay, excellent. So that's basically where we stand. I think we're in a pretty good place all the way around. Our economy is recovering. JSOL and finance have done some amazing work. And essentially, we are going to be doing outgoing fire, focused on learning how to do that better at the F2 level, and hunting down and going after enemy capitals wherever possible, and just wreaking as much individual pilot pain while ignoring citadels that do not matter and shooting only those the military have told us are worth shooting. I have a comment here from BillyBop about some sort of a corpse citadel policy. I'm just going to repeat this out loud. Corps can drop their own astros and forts and systems if they want to clone bait in a specific system. So, if your corp wants to drop their own forts or something like that, follow whatever the JSOL policy is. Talk to BillyBop or somebody else in JSOL if you have any questions, or actually just ask questions in Kremlin. Like, ask in the Kremlin if you have any questions about how to do that. That would be cool and good. Alright. I want to thank you guys for coming. Let's get back out there. We have a lot of work to do. Learn how to hunt the fucking puppies. Let's get out there and gank.