Fireside Chat Transcript 1 Aug 2k21
From Goon Wiki
Alright boys and girls, we're gonna get started here in a few minutes once the numbers stabilize. There are now 1600 of you on goonfleet.com mumble and we've just broken 1000 in the fireside chat so we're gonna let folks turn up here before I hurf these blurfs. Now I want everybody to know, it's not likely but it's possible that Sappy might try to interrupt the fireside which I hope they do because again they're headed up towards potentially 1700 on mumble. If we do have to engage in battle stations and stuff like that I will ask you all to shut the fuck up on mumble when the time comes if we do have to get into fleets. I don't want to get people's hopes up because the likelihood of these guys doing anything other than chasing after Havish and Initiative is pretty low but you never know and no hubris is the name of the game. Though we're gonna do a little bit of hubrising, a little bit of hubrising and we're gonna get like 5 minutes, like 2 minutes hate and we'll do like 5 minutes hubris and we'll get there but we're not there yet. We got a lot of work to do. Hubris edging, exactly. Alright so, unlike Vili I'm not actually gonna keep 1200+ people waiting. If people relate to the fireside they relate to the fireside and Cajanas is a hero and probably has this thing recorded. So on the one hand things are excellent, right? Everything is doing really well. I'm very happy with the things that we've been seeing this week and we have a lot to go over. On the other hand because things are going very well that also means that we have a shitload of work to do. I want everyone to understand at the outset of this if you turned up to this fireside expecting to hear me jacking us all off we will hand out some gold stars and stuff later. But what I want people to understand is the amount of work that is going to be necessary for us to do the needful that is coming down the pipeline way sooner than expected. I anticipated that we would be at the juncture that we are this weekend in about 2 months from now. So as far as my sort of intuition about where timelines have gone we are way ahead of schedule and that is thanks to just some of the most negligent, pathetic, cowardly, and obvious leadership failures at the highest level of EVE Online that I have ever seen in the last 15-16 years. Alright, give it a second. I don't want to brag or anything and then jinx ourselves but I do have an automated failover system as you guys just witnessed so the system works unlike our neighbors. Alright, hopefully we got the hubris out of our systems there. Famous last words. So I believe where I left off was insulting all of our enemies' leaders who have basically painted themselves into the biggest corner in the history of online gaming. I think that in the middle of all of us being smug and rightfully so as we do this pivot it's important to step back and recognize the sheer scale of the fuck-ups that we are witnessing next door to us in T5ZI. And how many of those fuck-ups are personally the responsibility of the individual leaders of Pappy, many of whom are like Manfred Sidious, shitty people. Manny ran out of, I saw a wonderful post from I think it was Bay C or somebody else I forgot, I don't get credit for this one, but it looks like Manny's Tiki Torch ran out of butane and he's put it up for sale in T5ZI. And yeah, let's make sure we're recording this thing before I get into it. I think Kahanas is probably on it again just fine but let me make absolutely certain. Yep, he is Johnny on the spot with his F2, thank God for Kahanas. Anyway, it's a lot to right and so there's on the one hand you're seeing a lot of what I would call failure cascade behavior from our foes next door. Reddit is a bloodbath and things are going haywire for them. At the same time we must do a tremendous amount of work because this war ends when, and this is very very important, I want you all to understand this, this war ends when we say it does. This war does not end when the hypocritical shitfucks in T5ZI say the war is over. It's gonna be our turn here after 13, I guess headed into 14 now, whatever months of this, because the puppies can say they started this thing in July 5th or whatever when the nip slipped but as we now know in public we have been working on this for about a month and a half before they actually announced their invasion because Piggles, Vili, Manny, these absolute failures as leaders let the whole thing slip. So we've been at this for a while and I want you guys to understand going into this that this is nowhere close to over because we have a lot of vengeance to seek and a lot of puppies to kill and we have an entire galaxy to remind why having a hell war against Gunnsorm and the Imperium is a bad idea. And I want you to understand going into this that you're gonna see a lot of excuses from the bad guys. You're already seeing a lot of excuses. Some of those excuses might take the form of what I call civility tanking. They started this war with, let me see this quote here from Vili, I actually put this down in my notepad here, "When we started this war we knew that we were fighting this to the end. For us this is a war of extermination. This is a war to the death. We are aiming for the removal of Metani and the Imperium from EVE Online. We are here to purge them." That's Vili. That's Vili and Polygon. That's Vili and Polygon last year. All of our enemies cheered for this. All of our enemies clapped for this. All of our enemies signed up and joined fleets and they saluted that flag. They marched that march, they cheered that cheer, they clapped for it, and now, now, when things look like maybe this wasn't such a good idea, some of them are gonna civility tank. They're gonna go, "Oh gosh, I was never really in. I was just loyal to my corporation or alliance and we just engaged in 13 plus months of a blood feud against the Imperium and signed up for a war of extermination because we're just here because we love EVE Online and we're, you know, maybe, maybe you could recruit me into the Imperium." Or "Gosh, why are you so mean? I never signed up for the war of extermination. I just participate in the war of extermination." There's gonna be a lot of good pappies wanting to show you that they're good pappies. And I want to say, fuck 'em. There was a time and a place for those guys to join us. There's many people who are actually pretty cool and pappy and they already joined us when the war was in a dark place or what seemed like it was in a dark place for us. The guys that were on their side that joined us when we were covered in mud and blood in the fucking trenches, dudes who came over when like Mibbles came over or when Hanzo Viper came over or when iFed came over, the guys that joined us when it was a cost to them and the rest of this stupid fucking nest of puppies and the rest of NullSec was insisting that we would be destroyed, those guys that joined us when it looked dark and it was a cost to them, those are our battle brothers. But these fucking pieces of shit, many of whom you are now going to see pissing themselves and begging and civility tanking or corn cobbing or any of the things that they're going to do, they are going to try to insist that the consequences of their actions should not apply to them and that oh now, especially when vengeance comes, when vengeance comes they will say that you are a bad person for seeking vengeance just as they spent the last 13 months saying that you are a bad person being a member of the Imperium and listening to little old me on a fireside. Now many of these people I've already put on a blacklist, they just don't know it, so some of the worst of the worst, I just want to make sure that the trash doesn't sneak in. So don't worry, we're blacklisting the worst of the worst as we see them, but not all of their worst posts. So when you have a puppy coming to you and playing for your sympathy and trying to insist that they didn't mean it or oh well that was just test or I like Elfboy and Elfboy didn't do any of those things. Steal your hearts, they don't deserve any mercy, they weren't going to give you any fucking mercy. And if you have a softer heart than me, that's great, that's good, I think it's probably a sign that you're, that's credit to you, right, like if you can find it in your heart to feel sympathy for them, that's wonderful. I don't have that luxury because I sit in the big chair and from the Emperor position it is important to remember who your enemies are and that just because they turn around and they say nice words and try to lick your ass in my world, there's actually even more reason to crush their fucking throats in Yvonne line because I'm sure a bunch of them are going to go Mitanni man bad when they hear this fireside and that's fine. So now what? That is the ultimate, excuse me, ultimate question here. I attempt to swallow and hurf blorfs at the same time. Let me have a sip of coffee. This is not exactly the fireside I expected to be given today. I expected, I don't know about you guys, but I expected yesterday and today to be up against the fucking wall defending against their final push or their serious push or whatever the fuck this was supposed to be. Not like watching reports of Titan after Titan fleeing north and Manfred fucking Holocaust joke piece of human garbage racist piece of shit idiot Manfred fucking tiki torch Sidious Mr. Oven himself selling his avatar on a public contract in T5Z. That's the stuff right there. That's the stuff. Mmm. Inject that shit in my veins. I love it. I love it. Apparently, I'm sure that you would be shocked to know this. I just got a report from the black hand quote. They are standing down blaming us for not wanting to play. If there is one word that I could use to sum up the attitude that Pappy has through this entire war, even before the war, one word to describe what brought them together, what brought them together and made them follow such fools as Manny, Billy, Pro God Legend, Elf Boy, the lot. That one word is entitlement. These fucking people are the most entitled pieces of shit. And unfortunately, that's the rest of fucking all sec. That's our enemies. They're the fucking puppies. The core of what makes a puppy a puppy at the end of the day is a sense of entitlement that here we are in the fucking sandbox game. We're hard in the fuck up is the theme of EVE Online and these entitled pathetic loser bitches for whom I have nothing but white hot contempt feel entitled to tell you who you should be friends with. They feel entitled to say how we should play EVE. They feel entitled to try to control all of NullSec. And the very fact that there is some group out there that does not want to bend the knee to their entitled weak, weak, hypocritical, pathetic asses. These pieces of shit dare to insist that we owe them something. That we owe them. It's astounding to me because from the long term perspective, if you remember, I started I joined Goon Fleet in July, not July, in January of 2006. I started playing in June of 2005 and Lordless, which is a precursor organization to Goon Fleet, along with FNLN, Fernock, Radial, and some of the old school crew. And almost immediately once Goon Fleet actually dared touch SovSpace, the moment that we aboard Goon shot XCH in Cloud Ring in June of 2006, well suddenly this was a huge problem for the powers that were, which were of course all of our enemies today. In many cases the exact same people. How dare people who do not play in the E-Honor, E-Bushido, Pubby way, how dare these fucking goons try to do something in NullSec that is not mediated through the approval process of this bucket of entitled failure shitfucks. You as a member of the Imperium, you can feel however you want to feel. You can say whatever you want to say. If you have mercy in your heart for our foes, I do not have a problem with that. But I want all of you to understand that there is no mercy in my heart for them. They have worked hard in the longest, most expensive, most obnoxious hell war in the history of online gaming, which includes the history of the internet. Thus far, this is it. This is the biggest war on the internet yet. Now maybe in the future there will be bigger ones, but right now here today we are on the turning point where our foes are about to break and run for the hills as their works of extermination collapses around them like their dreams and their faith and their incompetent shitty leaders. And I think that we should all take a moment to understand how much discipline and effort and how many sacrifices we have all had to make to get to this point. And while we acknowledge that, I want you to understand also that this is just the beginning. Whenever this has happened in the past, and it has happened several times before in the past, in the fountain war, in the great war, for example, when a hell war turns and the ball is in our court, that's just the beginning. We have spent 13 plus months on defense and now soon it'll be our turn. Now I understand that there are some pappy cowards who are going to be listening to this and if you are, go fuck yourself, pappy cowards. I want you individually who's listening to this to be offended that Mitanni Man Bad said something mean about you because fuck you, you deserve it. When they listen to this, they will be desperate to hear that I am going to loudly announce the Regenquista, which incidentally will not be televised. I don't know whether Pappy is going to even be around to defend against a hypothetical Regenquista because so many of them are busy running before we even have the opportunity to do that. I thought that would take several months of Ricefield's phase into Regenquista. We're just going to have to play this as it comes. But what I want you to understand is even if they are fleeing and shitting out squidding excuses about like Marcus Murphy going, "Oh, you guys were trying to build serenity and the game is screwed now because goons are going to win." While he spent the last year plus whining and preaching and proselytizing in the name of the largest blue donut of shame that has ever been assembled thus far in the history of the internet. Yeah, they might say that they're done, but we're not done. We haven't even begun to fight. We haven't even begun to get started with our phase, our fun. They started this war insisting that we were the 900-pound gorilla. And again, the theme of the Pubby Mind is entitlement. How dare the goons go over there? How dare the goons have friends? How dare people be friends with goons? They couldn't handle it. They insisted something had to be done. And well, something will be done. It's just going to be us who gets the opportunity to do the doing. And I look forward to their screams. So let me look at Elysium here and see what we got. I have a lot of gold stars to hand out, guys. But at the same time, in the process of holding out gold stars, what I really want you to understand is that regardless of what these entitled pieces of shit have to tell you about whether this war is over or not, this war is only just beginning. We have begun this war as the 900-pound gorilla. And now as we're starting to see some of these fools break and run, they're beginning to realize that we are the 1,000-pound gorilla. They have only made us stronger. They have brought all layers of our organization together. And just because they want to tap out now that it seems like, gosh, it didn't quite work out for them, they're going to want to say, good fight, good fight. I never signed on to that whole war of extermination thing and run for the fucking hills and go back to their little hovels wherever they were living on the other side of the galaxy. But for us, this is going to be a lot more work. But it's going to be fun. It already is fun. We're going to -- I can't really say any more about what we've got cooked up, but we have some wonderful, wonderful things to show you. Excuse me. All right. I want to highlight -- I'm sure everybody's seen here. I've already -- Manny selling his Titan is pretty much the biggest bellwether you can get. I want to harp on this a little bit because there are people who are in Pappy, fuck you, who might be listening to this fireside later, and they might not understand who Manfrancidious is, why he's Tiki Torch Manny. I'm not going to bother going into the whole racist stuff because we already know he's a racist piece of shit. But the significance of Manfrancidious putting his Titan up on contract in T5CI cannot be understated because I will remind everyone, Manfrancidious was the person that literally wrote the founding plan of the Pappy War. This is the guy that wrote the Vespiary document that Pappy Snowden leaked a few weeks ago. This is the fucking guy who designed this whole war. Now, of course, it was Manny, so he fucked it all up and they ended up fighting the complete opposite war of what they planned, and he included a bunch of racist things in the Vespiary document because Manny's going to Manny. But it is hilarious to me that I'm seeing some of these dumbass puppies on our eve saying, "Oh, well, what's Manny? Why does it matter that Manny, some guy put his Titan up on contract? It doesn't fucking matter." Yeah, you dumbasses. That is the guy who you were following. That's the guy who was part of the inner circle when the whole thing began. Manny and Elfboy and Piggles and Villy and Vince, they were there planning it all out in May. And now today, I wake up and Manfrancidious is Titan. Tiki Torch Manny on contract in T5CI. The writing is on the fucking wall, and it's going to be on us to get ready. If you were here in the first Great War, you remember that when these things swing, they swing hard, they swing fast. Tallsting.jpg, we're going to have fucking Tallsting's revenge here. It's going to require all of us to purge a lot of bad guy stuff. Now maybe when they hear me say this, they will cancel their evacuation plan. Not like it really matters because half their people are already running up the chain. The other half of them are going, "Oh, I don't know who Manfrancidious is," or, "Oh, no, people aren't really evacing." Whatever their excuses are, it doesn't fucking matter. To see this thing through, I need to ask more of you. I know you have already committed massively. No one has been as committed as the Imperium thus far in the history of online games on the internet. I want you to remember, no one has done what you have done ever thus far at this scale with this intensity. This is a historic accomplishment. It is literally going to be written about for decades. It is literally going in a fucking history book. And you did that. You were responsible for our victory. You turned up. You did the fucking work when it got ugly. But now I need to ask more of you. I understand the amount of sacrifices that have been made for this. I understand that the puppies are saying that they're going to be fucking running off or they're not running off or they've got some excuses or whatever the fuck. There must be consequences for what the puppies have done. There must be consequences. And so even though you have sacrificed and you have fought and you've stayed up late and you have alarm clocked and you have dealt with the constant frustration of the most noxious entitled puppy fucks the galaxy has ever vomited forth. I need to ask more of you to make sure that these people have everything that they have in our space and elsewhere fucking burn. Because test isn't just next. Test is soon. Test is very, very, very soon. Now as is brave, as will be many others. And to get there, it's going to require a lot of internet spaceship violence. And so even though we have been doing this for going heading into month fucking 14 now, I need more from you to get us the vengeance that our people deserve and to send a fucking message to the rest of the galaxy about what happens when you fuck with the Imperium to say and show for all what happens when you say, quote, when we started this war, we knew we were fighting this to the end for us. This is a war of extermination. This is a word of the death. We are aiming for the removal of the baton in the Imperium from evil line. We are here to purge them. Actions have consequences. And I ask your help and bringing those consequences about to our foes. Thank you for coming. Let's get back out there and murder these bitches. Vengeance is near. Test is soon.