Fireside Chat Transcript 7 Nov 2k21
From Goon Wiki
Alrighty boys and girls, we're gonna get started. The Euros have been over DST for a hot minute or two and here in Freedomland we are only just catching up. As a reminder, I am a simple creature and changing things based on eve time is beyond my capabilities. We tend to do, firesides and metashows are always keyed to Wisconsin time. That's less because I'm special and more because I just need help. So if you're wondering when firesides are gonna be, it's gonna be now, every Saturday going forward, every Sunday going forward until the next time they fuck with the schedules on us. I know you guys are absolutely desperate to get me to pull a dunk dinkle there. Alright, we're gonna let people filter in here for a second, I'm gonna refill my coffee and we're gonna get going. Hopefully with the application of tons of caffeine and riddling a little bit of weed to the problem I can get in the groove and convince myself that it's actually 2pm. Okay, I'm actually gonna go ahead and, nope, nevermind, people are still filtering in, I'm gonna get the coffee, I'll come back. There's an annoying ESI related thing that Kaznir has asked me to address with everybody, it's only gonna apply to corp CEOs, which in theory would be, hey, take it to the Kremlin, but if you have an alt corp and you're an alt corp CEO, we're gonna get to that too. Alright, I will be right back and then we'll get started. I am back, I got some coffee and we are ready to rock. You guys are desperate, I love it, you guys are hungry for this fucking bingo. I'm the Mitanni and if you don't know who the fuck I am, why the hell are you on this fireside? That's as good as I'm gonna give you. How about that? Jesus Christ, I've never at any point actually, like, introduced myself on anything, I was stunned when Dunk did that, that's like, the fuck? The Mitanno. Alright, so, fucking around regardless, I wanna talk about you guys getting rich. We don't know what the fuck CCP is doing, right? And I'm gonna give some shoutouts in a little bit here, actually, I'll just do it right now. If you saw the meta show yesterday, it was one of the most conclusive macroeconomic beatdowns I have witnessed. I am a simple creature, I do not mean to suggest that I understand any of the things that came out of Angry Mustache or Kaznir's Mouths. But I did see a lot of slides and I did see all of the people that understand their language, ooh and ah, as if it was fucking WrestleMania. Like Angry Mustache would talk about a certain point on a chart about how a thing meant a thing and then the meta show chat went fucking crazy, I can only assume it was fucking WrestleMania, but for macroeconomics. So what happened there was essentially I got to the point where I got sick of getting up there every week and saying, "Why the fuck is a Wiver 90 billion-esque?" And Brisk and I decided that we were gonna get some of the goons from finance experts to get up there and just beat the shit out of CCP. And I didn't know what they were gonna say, I basically said, "Weapons free, you don't have to hold anything back, just call it like you see it." And yeah, so there's gonna be more of that and I just wanted to say, if I had known that Angry Mustache can rock a PowerPoint like that, I would have sent his bitch ass to Iceland on the previous CSM candidate roster and we are gonna, sucks to be you dude, have fun storming the capital, but that is exactly like, I basically just wanna watch Angry Mustache lecture CCP on things that they are supposed to be paid to know over and over and over again. I'm mad, I'm delighted by his weaponized PowerPoint abilities. Kaznir did a great job, Kaznir was there too, I know I'm oohing and aahing over Angry Mustache because I'm just delighted. But him and Kaznir went out there and did some fucking jobs. And the hope is maybe CCP will listen to the best finance team in the fucking galaxy, but hope springs eternal. Yeah, I would not be surprised if both of those poor bastards get sent to Iceland next year because that means I don't have to. As long as we can find young, eager things that wanna go off and storm the castle and argue with Icelanders all day every day, the more we can find people to do that, the less likely I have to do it. So that's good. Alright, so what does that have to do with getting money goons? It's kind of a natural segue actually. Because we don't know what the fuck CCP is going to do, and since I wasn't born yesterday and have been playing this game for way too fucking long, I don't think that we should be anticipating that magically scarcity is going to change or do anything like that anytime soon. Beatings will continue until CCP learns how to unfuck their economy by listening to subject matter experts in the same way that I do. But until then, the strategic desire is pretty clear, which is get as fucking rich as you can as long as we can do some delve time unit bullshit and dig in and just get money goons. Get money. You've got some distractions in terms of fun content we can have running around and using fucking just nonsense going around blowing up fancy minikawas, just like earlier. That's great. But the main thing is I want you guys to just stockpile like motherfuckers. Like if it gets to the point where they unfuck the economy and they're like, "Hey, it's not going to cost 90 billion to build a Wyvern." If we have been dedicated in replenishing our war chest and making ISK, we will be in a very good position when we get to the other side of whatever nonsense CCP is up to. So in terms of what I want people to do, hope is the first step on the road to disappointment. But at the same time, we should strategically just get as much as we can under an anticipation that at some point CCP may recognize the amount of damage that they have done to their own economy. And then we will continue to be in an ideal position to handle things. I find myself in an extremely unusual position where I have been having to be ever more loud in statements against our own interests. Like I'm saying, "Hey guys, we blew up all the bad guys fucking super caps compared to us. We have a huge relative strategic advantage. Things are going great over here in Imperium land. But if you would please stop fucking your economy over to the point these dumbasses can grow something back such that we can blow them up again, that would be nice." So that's where we stand. Have I made any PI accounts for my fish so they can make fresh water for their tank? I should probably do that actually, because earlier I found that one of our filters had temporarily stopped only for a couple hours and had an emergency fish un-fucking. Congratulations on your bingo. Is it better having an economy where our enemies cannot remake supers and titans? That's a good question. In theory, that's true. But then in practice, if we don't have puppies to fight, what the fuck are we doing here? I'm going to go deep dive old school nerd reference here. I remember reading, I was in the seventh or eighth grade and it was the Dragonlance Chronicles. One of those things where Graceland goes off and becomes fisted and antiless and there's all sorts of old school 90s fan shit. One of the things that stuck with me, even in seventh grade Alec's mind, was there's a scene where Graceland has become God and taken over everything and it's an empty, dead world because if you just conquer everything and kill everything, it's bad, which is something the Band of Brothers never understood. As we have repeatedly said, we do not want to rule over the fucking puppies because we only want people who want to be in the Imperium and feel like they have found a place where they belong here. The entire point is not ruling the puppies. That's how it is. So until CCP makes it such that everyone can build dreadnoughts again, I want us murdering puppy dreadnoughts, but if they ain't building them, the entire thing is just a mess. Basically they should listen to fucking Angry Moustache and Kaznir and ask questions until they figure it out. But that's my general stance and I think it's a reasonable question. Thank you for giving me that softball there, SixofFive. All right, I don't understand the question about life support unit. Oh, that's a PI question. If Angry Moustache tells you to do particular components, do exactly what he says here. All right, let's go on to the ESI problem. So Carneros brings this up. Thank you for redirecting me. So apparently, look, we don't know exactly what's going on in the back end, but there are issues pulling ESIs for corporates in our system. And this only applies to people that are the CEOs of member corporations and that implies also all corporations. So basically, please, Kaznir has given me to read here so I don't fuck up. Bear with me. Corporate CEOs can re-register their CEO pilots ESI in Geiss and it could fix the current spate of data pull issues. CCP has done something on their back end that has made all of our code guys mad enough that I've got to talk to you guys about this. And it applies to AltCorps too. So in Geiss, make sure that you re-register your CEO pilot. And I have a sneaking suspicion that I am going to have to go do this on the Mitani myself, once I get out of the fireside. Oops. CEO and director keys can use a re-reg and it'll save time and pain in the ass if there's questions following up with it. But basically, that's the deal. That is the entirety of my knowledge about the subject, but feel free to ask further questions about this and the finance teams that actually know what the... Finance directors that know what the fuck will be able to tell us about that. Perfect. Yeah, so essentially just re-reg those characters in Geiss and it should unfuck things on whatever CCP end result in this nonsense to begin with. It's more likely than you think. All right, let me take some questions here. A couple of other data points, we did make a decision to punt on doing a Dallas thing. So the main events in terms of socializing at the big scale are going to be DC in January. And then we're going to be doing FanFest. I will be at FanFest. We have a lot of goons at the Eve London meetup this weekend, which has also been happening. So life is kind of getting back to normal and thank fuck. All right. We go ahead and take some questions from people. Got a comment here about Brave not doing so well, how some people are feeling sorry for them. One of the things to keep in mind when you see Brave newbies eating shit and losing a lot of capitals, if you briefly feel a moment of sympathy because you are sucked into the "Oh, Dong Dingle's a nice guy. Why are they doing anything to that?" Keep in mind that the dumbass who was leading that Brave capital whelp was sharded fucking armor. Right? So every time you feel sympathy or pity for Brave, think to yourself, you feel bad because you like Dunk maybe. Congratulations. Dunk's a good dude. That's all well and good. Great. But underneath Dunk is a whole military organization that chooses to follow a motherfucker like sharded armor. And watching Horde and Test display their true nature and start devouring their former allies that they spent a year and a half with fighting, it tells you everything that you need to know about Test. I personally love the fact that Test is continually trying to create some sort of a bloody shirt revenge narrative about, "Oh my God, Brave did a sale deal with Goon Swarm for the GE Tech Heapstar and that thus, you know, something bad is going to happen." Because the more Test screams about that, the happier I am because it shows how tone deaf and dumb they are to everyone. And I think it's important that the louder that Test gets, the more fun it will be for us. And it also shows Elfboy what he's up to. He's like, "Yeah, yeah, I want my organization to be side by side with Test Alliance and turn on our allies." But, you know, whatever. Their allies were shit and they are shit. So that's kind of what they get. I think that they... Do we still need broadcast nodes? I bel... You know, that's an angry mustache question. If I can get a finance guy to pop in here and let us know. So I'm going to say yes. Angry mustache says yes, we do need broadcast nodes. We definitely still need more PI in general. Do I think that PI is fun? I think it all depends upon the greater cause, right? Like one of the reasons why I got into PI is that I wanted to build Citadels and it was also something that was going to help the war effort. Bingo bait as it is, but there you go. In a situation where we do have a supply crunch, I think that's important. The ad says that we're at a generalized need for P4 in general, not for specific types. That's great because GSOL has managed to get rid of a lot of the bottlenecks by being fucking heroes and getting so much of our infrastructure up and running. Carneros points out that the Corp CEO thing seems to affect allies as well. Yeah, guys, this is not related to Gunthorne. The situation of CCP's ESI being busted as it relates to who knows what the fuck. Certainly in our Geist system and probably galaxy wide is something where people are going to need to re-register their CEO characters in whatever manager systems their alliance has happened to use because our best people have come back with, you know, this is CCP's thing because we know it's a pain in the ass to ask people to re-register shit on the fucking ESI. It's not like, oh wow, I can't wait to get up in front of 600 people and tell them to do something they already did. We explored the options and our people came back with, gee, this is another thing that's fucked up on CCP's end. Do take a look at it if you are the CEO of an all of Corp or of a member Corp, wherever you are and what other systems you might be plugged into, there's something fucky with CCP's ESI. We got some questions about F2s. I think that peacetime is a wonderful opportunity for everybody to devote their talents beyond just being an F1 monkey. If you remember from the war, we had this whole thing, which is still a part of our culture and will always be a part of our culture. Like doing a cultural revolution is the kind of thing where we tinker with the core operating system of the tribe itself, of how we say this is what is expected in the video game eve online within Goon Swarm and how we do things. For people that either missed this part of the war or are just coming back, what had happened was we realized during the middle of the war that it was extremely difficult to ask everybody in the leadership layer of the organization, and that includes sub directors and member Corp CEOs and member Corp directors, basically everybody who is out there trying to make things happen, that the guys in that area of the org were doing seven or nine different things simultaneously. It just got to the point where I did not feel like it was morally correct to have an organization where at the line level, you are only expected to do just one thing. That is enough. That's not fair to the people that are giving more. The whole point of F2 is that you have many opportunities to do more than just figure out how to do one thing in a fleet and press F1. Develop your F2s, then develop your F3s. Do more than just the one thing. Do more than just the bare minimum. If you'd like some guidance on how to do that, we actually have a sticky thread for the cultural revolution. Please link in the Alessia. Shout outs to our Alliance tournament team. Yeah, we fight out there. It's always interesting every year, and I understand that there have been some technical difficulties on the CCP broadcast this go round. It's always an adventure. Congratulations on your bingo. We demand chat porn. All right, let's see. Do we have anything besides bingo bait here, gentlemen? We have lots of bingo bait to go through, but it is this interesting situation where we're waiting for CCP to get their thumbs out of their ass. In the meantime, the only sensible thing for us to do is to continue to get money while we watch the pappies murder each other and then help the pappies murder each other as best as we can. Yeah, I miss the war too. Peace is hell. I think it is terrible that the core engines of the economy in this game has been broken because we're doing great, relatively speaking. We still have debt to manage. We still have lots of fancy finance things to do, but we have the best and the brightest in the galaxy working on that. As far as our competitive economic position is concerned, I think that we're managing our risks pretty well and we're in front of it, which is great because that means that we'll continue to have a competitive advantage over time compared to these other organizations that are not taking the steps that we are. But on the third hand, I would like the puppies to be able to make dreadnoughts such that we can take the dreadnoughts away from the puppies and blow up their citadels and do what kind of feels like drone striking somebody through a time portal 5,000 years ago in a cave or something. It's just not much. We continue to have this scenario where the people that aren't in test and the people that weren't really there during the great out are in full denial about the level of destruction that we delivered to the foe after August 3rd. We just sort of cleared the table of everything they had done and dealt and they were true believers about how whatever they can put everything they wanted down and it'll be fine. And then because CCP had just I think angry moustache and Kazner's argument yesterday was quite accurate was that CCP looked at the pandemic and looked at what the war was doing and came to the conclusion that everything was great with their amazing scarcity thing and that scarcity results and we're all this other dumbass bullshit that nobody believes in if they have ever played the fucking game. So you know here we are the pandemic is easing up the you know knock on wood the war is over and you know where is the stuff for the puppies to rebuild so we can orbital strike it and take it away from them. It's a pain. I appreciate it guys. I I hate peace. I just despise peace. You guys know I despise peace with peace time bringing more warm holders and small time rumors here we encourage the theorycraft ways to fight against that sale PPP independently IE corp based home defense fleets. One of the things about this organization is corpse are encouraged to do whatever the fuck corpse want to do right as long as it's not running up against one of our you know sort of imperial policies or anything like that it's not going to be a thing where it's like oh hey like you shouldn't do that if you guys want to run around and gang people doing that absolutely do so another couple questions some things about crab swarms and things about talk then better Woffman's actually the ad looked into a Woffman tax situation and fixed it just the other day we were overtaxing ourselves for reasons that you know I'm in theory the CEO of Woffman I had no idea we had said the moon taxes to her we had so sorry about that guys the ad noticed it and got it on fucked what clan am I going to play in vampire the masquerade to Jesus the Metani originally was a Malkavian a Malkavian elder and second edition Woff could use some moons that you can actually use work all on thank you the ad and I will make a note of that take a look at it our locust taxes producing the desired revenue I am not qualified to answer that question locust taxes are looking good see this is this is just one of those things that kind of bothers me and it was sort of like I couldn't really rant about this too much on the meta show yesterday but it just drives me crazy like it is a simple enough thing to as a leader assume that your penis is not going to shrink like a little dick bitch just because you know you're wrong about something right I don't know a fucking thing about macro tier finance I don't need to know how to set up a fucking you know debt system with war bonds and securities and all of this other shit in order to make it happen you just need to find the right fucking people it's kind of like a manager like up here at the top of the man the like metagame in the tiny world a lot of times it is like a big management simulator right you want to find the best possible people and put them in the right position and enable them to do their thing and then have the know-how to go gee maybe we should just listen to the guys that clearly know their shit especially considering that their error checking each other and then implement that right and so it frustrates me every time I'm like up here on a fireside and you know I don't feel like my dick shrinking when I'm saying hey I don't know the answer maybe you'll ask the edge maybe you know whatever I'll get up here in front of five hundred eighty nine people and be like I don't know you see he just did that you know Jesus Christ it's not that fucking hard good luck with my new business adventure thank you so the funny thing people didn't figure this out because we're too busy ranting about CC yesterday but I've written probably about three thousand words about interior design because I got mad about furniture and as you guys know when I get mad about things I build an empire so I wrote an entire guide to interior design basically yeah so there's a lot of words on that firm that I wrote because I got butt blasted and that's the kind of thing that I do when I get butt blasted is start building empires it's baby steps there all right here I'll I'm unprepared let me get a link I'm pretty hesitant about trying to like say anything that's commercial on a fireside so I'm linking people to like why mad for so there's a whole story about this you guys remember when I was doing the fuck palace this is like back in May and we were building fuck palace and I bought a fucking massage chair it's like I got vaccinated and like my girlfriend and I were like we're gonna upgrade our lives and it's gonna be great and I want to like survive the pandemic I'm a set 50 grand on fire and just dramatically upgrade everything in my house and it turned out to be just a huge fucking pain in the ass and I got mad about feeling like I was shopping like I feel like I'm in the girls bathroom or I shouldn't be I've never actually walked into a girl's bathroom but I have that sort of feeling like I'm not supposed to be there every time that I went to try to buy furniture that a nerd like me would like and so I got butt blasted now we have this thing which is mad for in his early days we have soft launched it we have gotten a few things through we want to make sure that the stuff is actually good so if you have questions comments please give us feedback but I don't want to waste people's time like pitching stuff on a fireside hard but this is something that you guys need to know if I'm launching a business or I'm doing something or like that it might impact you in some way so don't worry this one's got nothing to do with you online I'm just mad about the fact that you know I'm 43 years old and every time I try to go buy some furniture I feel like I'm supposed to like get a hypothetical wife to sign off on it and like do the thing and I'm just not supposed to be there making decisions about it and so I got mad and built a business there you go we are actually looking later once we make sure that everything is running and is functional we have looked at we're actually just talking joking about like having dick but branded exclusives like you know hiding a dick but on the furniture somewhere but you know first we got to get the thing off the ground and working and you know very much soft launch soft sell like not trying to get people to fuck it you know if you see stuff you like great alrighty let's talk about something else here one of the things that will goons get a discount go code for your new business enterprise we will probably have something like that for friends and family was just like we literally just hit the button on this thing and went out to a comedy show last night it's just like you know even getting something to soft launch capable is such a huge pain in the ass business wise that you know press the button walk away and went to see Elisa Schlesinger last night and Madison who is pregnant and not happy about it which is perhaps not a surprise if you ever seen an Elisa show anyway were the crab beacons a half-baked attempt to placate board capital pilots are already viable that is a very good question my understanding currently is is that because of the amount that they can be done per day that they don't necessarily scale from an alliance perspective but from an individual perspective it might be worth it but I would really prefer to wait to see what angry or somebody who knows what the fuck like I would trust somebody like plaid rabbit or angry mustache or the edge to tell us right now if they are good or bad as a professional the nerds guide is actually good I don't know a fucking thing about home goods or furniture or design I just got really mad and you guys know me when I get really mad about something you know I start trying to build an empire thank you no more what are my feelings on us managing to find a way to run the crab beacons with rural calls instead of six hours of release I was really fucking proud I was at Vegas and I was informed because you know it's like what's the status on this because we are obviously trying to manage our financials because managing our financials is going to result in better preparedness ability to stab puppies in the video game you've online and you know one of the reasons why we tend to be able to run rings around our enemies is that I have created this sort of meritocracy thing where like one of the reasons why I like angry mustache so much is he has absolutely he doesn't give a fuck what I think like he will just say exactly what he thinks things are in angry mustache land and even if it annoys me and he's good at the things that he do so he does so the base was very large connected brain trust of the space tribe vomits forth high talent individuals and so much of my job as the space number is actually just spotting talent giving a badge and shooting anything that gets in their way and you know the kumi is the director of kumi he does kumi things so bring it back to the crab sites and the rural calls it's an example in my mind of the system working right because when our brain trust collectively is able to work together and communicate internally and respect good ideas and implement and test things so rapidly it's one of the reasons why we're able to win the war it's one of the reasons why we are where we are today is because we have this brain trust that thrusts forth the best and brightest and as the system works we then take their learnings and copy and paste it across everyone that fucking rule to keep on doing shit like that guys we're gonna need everybody to think outside the box in general because ccb doesn't seem to know what is the box what's in the box what's outside the box like yikes yikes let me take another couple of these emperium plans for fan fest um is the alliance doing an actual thing next year well my ass is gonna be in iceland in may i am desperately eager to be able to see my euro friends and to just in general do my normal thing in the before times my like one of the reasons why it's great like so this is one of the reasons i'm just sort of run my mouth here guys but this is absolutely true one of the reasons why i was so funny during the war when like villian elf boy and basically a bunch of bitches who are afraid to go to eve meets and like actually hang out with people like elf boy will go to eve meets but he's off doing elf boy things in his little keyboard castle castle or whatevs but you know one of the things that we saw amongst the pappies during the war is that they were a bunch of dudes who generally speaking don't go to eve meets and so they didn't know who they were declaring war on in their little war of extermination and the whole like get the mitanni to stop doing this they have no idea how much fun it is to fly around the world like four times a year and hang out with your buddies in different locations all around the world we're like oh i'm in paris with actual parisian goons and they're gonna show me where i can get foie gras and and you know beef tartare four in the fucking morning where i can gorge myself watching boat flirt with dr short dragon's girlfriend and create a war and then go poop a whole bunch the next day you know that kind of experience is one of the things that makes me so excited to get back out there and you know get to fan fest get to london get to fucking vegas again next year and you know if we can get to eve stradant this year that would be cool like there's just a bunch of options that i am very eager to get back back to um you know it's not like we talk about eve too much of these things we mainly you just get a crew of people that you can see the fucking world with nerds like you and it's wonderful and those idiots who thought that they're gonna try to take that away from me uh uh uh uh no way so yeah i'm gonna be at fucking fan fest we're gonna roll hard it's gonna be great all right boys and girls i have run my mouth enough thank you very much for coming this week i want you guys to work together i want you guys to get rich i want you to listen to your best and brightest uh let's keep on keeping on and we will wait and see what ccp has to say about scarcity get rich my goons i will see you next week thanks for coming